Dear Friend

Dear Friend,

This is never an easy letter to write, but it still needs to be written. Recently through no fault of my own, you were accidently deleted out of my life. Totally, systematically, completely and irretrievably deleted out of my life. It was not you, it was me. Although in some cases this is not a bad thing, it was not my goal to end our facebook lives together in such an abrupt manner. When I say it was me and not you, that is not entirely true. It wasn't me either. I am not interested in pointing fingers or laying blame, but trust me when I tell you that it wasn't intentional and it wasn't me. Right now I am committed to rebuilding our facebook lives together. I understand in some cases this will be more difficult than others, because when the sacred bond of trust that is present in all relationships, is broken, sometimes you never get it back. I hope this doesn't happen to us. I didn't realize how much I missed your almost constant updates, your every thought and movement chronicled to the point where I lost track of where your life began and my life ended. No one wants to walk in this world alone and just knowing you were out there watching a movie, and entering a play by play commentary about that movie made it seem like we were watching it together. Thank you! I look forward to our next meal together. Now the fact that I don't remember all of you, should not diminish the feelings I have for you and that you are missed. I want you back, even if I can't remember who you are. So, if you see me on facebook, DON'T look the other way or tag me in some unflattering photo (we both know my name isn't Dick), or worse yet, bad mouth me to our former mutual friends. I didn't pick them over you, I just remembered them first.

Looking forward to being your friend again,

Rafe

Lake Dreamland

Who wouldn't want to go to a place called Lake Dreamland? It is a real place. It exists, not just in our imaginations but also in our hearts. It is both familiar and foreign, both old and new, where the past and present live side by side. The winds howl and the dirt calls to you, if you are lucky you can still hear the faint sounds of rock and roll in the trees. Surrounded by water, you are in a state of suspended animation. Time stands still and passes you by at the same time. The boy on the bicycle might be a clue. Some say it is a magical place, by some I mean someone, by someone, I mean me.

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One Gril, One Boy

On my latest trip to River Valley Cemetery, (I was already in Lake Dreamland, it would have been rude not to stop by.) I was looking around, there is always more to discover. And I noticed another typo. (see previous post-Vietman.) It's not like I am wandering through the cemetery doing spellcheck on every grave, it's just that, in the course of exploring the cemetery certain things come up. Like how all the headstones, crosses and memorials are all leaning to one side, because of the ground constantly shifting underneath them, (nuclear leakage...) So they are all tilting at a right or left angle, (if they are still standing at all.) This particular memorial, was a white metal sign attached to a little metal pole. It was handwritten, and it gave her name, and under the dates of her birth and death, (she was in her forties when she died.) It said, she was the mother of one gril and one boy.

Regular readers know I am a master of the delayed response. (See any previous post). So it takes a second or two for things to register in my brain. (On a good day. Sometimes it takes weeks or years.) On this particular day it took a few seconds. I am pretty sure she is not the mother of a gril, (even if, by some miracle, she was the mother of a grill, it's still a typo.) I don't know the circumstances of her death, other than it was premature, but we can be reasonably certain it was not her intention to leave as her epitaph, a final shout out to her son and a beloved appliance. I am just sad.

Detritus

A lot of random thoughts cross my mind. Sometimes I write them down and sometimes I don't.

Here is last weeks detritus.

She is a big woman. Too big to be that loud. She is built like a blonde bear, who's a little short on honey.

I came out of a coffee shop and and saw a car in the parking lot, my first thought was, that looks exactly like my car. It was my car. This happens on a regular basis. Like the time I saw a guy on a BART train in the Bay Area and thought, Wow, that guy looks exactly like my brother Mark. I mean exactly. It was my brother Mark. Is it just me?

I was behind a woman in line at CVS. She had a box of wine and a card. I couldn't see the card, but I was guessing it was a birthday card. I don't know, she didn't seem terribly festive, maybe it was a get well card. Nothing cheers you up like a box of wine and a card.

I saw a man crossing the street wearing and pulling an oxygen tank. He was smoking. It made me a little nervous. That's not cool, right? I'm just glad he wasn't also pumping gas at the same time.

Some people are really offended by profanity. Naturally, these people are assholes.